Weezer - Weezer (The Red Album)

Pork And Beans (Album Version)...

Anyone who was on the internet the weekend of May 23rd, 2008 can probably recall the first time they saw Weezer's music video for the first single from their third self-titled release, called "Pork and Beans". The video was essentially a three-minute thrill ride through the best and worst memes and isms that the world wide web has spawned since its birth. This catchy little piece of pop culture brought a new hope to Weezer fans worldwide; the same fans that had essentially given up on the band after a series of mishaps, namely 2005's miserable Make Believe and Rivers Cuomo growing an ironic mustache. All was good in their power-pop kingdom, and The Red Album was expected to be their best since the murky sound of 1996's cult classic Pinkerton.

But their dreams were cut short upon the album's release, when we discovered that this was Rivers' attempt at producing his very own White Album, and the initial steps of the band's transition into the tweenybopper/pseudo-trendy vibe that plagued last year's Raditude, an album whose biggest highlight is the overly ambitious dog on the cover. The Red Album is riddled with tracks about getting dangerous, making trouble, and even features the other members of Weezer singing on a few songs; however, I regret to inform you hopefuls that the colorful and lively "Pork and Beans" is probably the best the album has to offer.

Rivers' enigmatic desire to be hip and trendy is a recurring theme throughout the ten tracks. In "Troublemaker", he sings of being edgy and "marrying a bee-otch/having seven kids". In "Pork and Beans", he stops at nothing to make sure he gets his point across; he will do the things that he wants to do, and he doesn't have a thing to prove to you. He even refers to himself as 'the greatest man that ever lived' at one point, a title that will likely never be bestowed upon him unless he gives up on becoming a high-school quarterback-esque figure that 'can't stop partying' and goes back to the persona he carried on the group's first two albums: the guy that got his ass beat by the high-school quarterback.


"You wanted arts and crafts?
How's this for arts and crafts?
WANAAUANUAUAAUANUANANUUNNUNNUNNN
That's right!"

-Rivers Cuomo


Final Score: 55/100